And the Loser was...

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Wednesday, 30 June 2010 0:50

And the Loser was...

Well, hard to tell, so I shall categorise them in true movie award style. Although, I'm sure all were deserving of their Golden Nymphs, these may be more apt.

THE TURNED TO STONE NYMPH... for the longest if not necessarily the most tedious speech -

to a charming Russian production that went on well past its listening to date.

THE LINGUAPHONE NYMPH...  for the worst translation of acceptance speech -

"I could do this thanks to many people.. it is what I dreamt since I was big."

THE MRS MALAPROP NYMPH ... for the most memorable line for the wrong reason -

" My tie is a tomato"

THE MRS THATCHER NYMPH ...for inappropriate use of handbag (twice) -

Mrs Zeigler - honestly you could have left it under your seat - this is Monaco for heaven's sake.

THE DAVID BAILEY NYMPH ... for the worst case of missed photo opportunity on stage -

This is a toughie as most of the recipients did and had to be shouted back from half way back to their seats.

THE QUASIMODO NYMPH... for worst impression of Hunchback of Notre Dame -

Some very tall guy who now has a permanent dowager's stoop from bending over the microphone whilst giving a groveling acceptance speech

THE KLINGON NYMPH... for worst behaviour around a celebrity -

The person seated in front of me (who incidentally would possibly win the worst dress award too) for jumping up and almost jumping on Roger Moore, leaving the man visibly shaken and possibly stirred.

THE DOLLY PARTON NYMPH... for most inappropriate use of spandex -

Don't get me started!

THE CONCRETE OVERSHOES NYMPH... for the worst timings and cues -

Both presenters, pretty much all evening.

THE RIVIERA WOMAN NYMPH... for endurance above and beyond the call of duty -

Is shared equally between Anna for almost staying awake and yours truly for outstanding bladder control.

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